It's Probably Me
by Ljiljana
Summary: Sasuke shows up on Naruto doorstep, yet again. Naruto, of course, lets him in. - - yep, it's manga slash but AU


It's Probably Me

.

* * *

Naruto wakes up full five seconds before there is a loud, painfully familiar knock on his door. He does not move, he does not breathe for a moment, while his heart is trying to break out of his chest. There is no doubt about it, because he knows himself well enough; he _will_ answer. But it would be good, it would be refreshing if he at least wasn't so relieved.

Guiltily happy and pissed off, in a futile attempt to calm his racing heart down, he heaves a relived sigh, though there is a niggling felling of guilt and annoyance in it. It doesn't work, so Naruto gets out of the bed to put some clothes on.

On the other side of the door just as he expected, he finds Sasuke. All the plans of yelling for being woken up and for the ridiculous situation in general die off on his lips as soon as he finds Sasuke's face. Sasuke's right eye is bruised, just enough to see it in the fading darkness. It's hardly the first time Naruto is witnessing a sight like that but he fiercely hates just the same. It is not something he can get used to, not after all this time, not ever.

Sasuke bears that scrutiny wordlessly. He is not hugging himself against the whipping wind outside, just standing there. He looks hurt, like the bruise is just the tip of the iceberg, even though his eyes are as barren as ever and show nothing of it. Maybe it's the slightly crooked angle in his pose. Or maybe, Naruto is just looking for an excuse to let him in.

It doesn't matter, for the decision has been made already. Years ago.

He exhales the air that was starting to get stale in his lungs and moves away just enough to let Sasuke in. There is a pause, a very mute moment during which Sasuke closes his eyes so tightly that it must be painful. When he opens them, he is already moving, walking inside. He is not looking at Naruto any longer.

_How did you find me_? Naruto itches to demand. But he doesn't.

"Tea?" He asks. Sasuke likes tea. It should be safe enough.

Sasuke doesn't answer. He is walking the house over, looking left and right and even up. Naruto now wants to know what he is expecting to find on the ceiling. He restrains himself, taught better than that by the past. It's just one of the countless weird things Sasuke does. It is a quirk, it's private, or a secret and thus off limits.

Naruto leaves him to it. His hands are shaking. He doesn't approve of Sasuke showing up at his new house at a creepy hour, _again_, but at least he knows Sasuke is okay. Well enough, anyway. Not that Naruto knows why it's like that, but God knows Sasuke is hurt often enough. Practically every time he shows up at Naruto's doorstep, in some way.

When the tea is ready, Naruto takes the mug with him, in search for Sasuke. It warms his hands that somehow got as cold as ice despite the mild weather.

Sasuke is in the living room and he is sitting on the couch. His shirt is lifted a little so he would be able to inspect an ugly and bluish bruise that is large enough to cover every bit of skin Naruto can see. Naruto gasps in sympathy, stunned. Sasuke lets his shirt fall down.

Naruto places the mug in front of him; upset and worried.

"So what happened?" He demands, giving in. The five minutes of restraining is about as long as he can ever manage, anyway.

Sasuke looks up at him disapprovingly, as if to say _I expected better from you_. Then he smiles, just a tiny little bit. It is not a nice smile.

"When did you move?"

Naruto is so annoyed with his flipping stomach and electrified chest he wants to stomp his foot. It's inappropriate to react that way seconds after seeing that bruise. He glares instead, which just makes Sasuke spread the smile a notch.

Naruto breaths in a lot of air. "Two months ago. I've got a job here, it's nice."

He has been teaching gym class, which is what he wants to do. The town is small but close to the city that he grew up in. He used to spend summers with his grandparents here, so he knows people. He fit in effortlessly.

"What happened to your old job?"

_I gave it up so I could try to have some resemblance to normal life_ is not something Naruto can say, because 'normal life' means 'not waiting during every moment of every hour for you to stop by'.

He shrugs instead. "How did you find me?"

Sasuke's eyes darken when his eyelashes lower to cast a shadow over circles under his eyes. "Were you trying to make sure I wouldn't?"

"_No_." Naruto instantly responds. It is the truth - if looked at carefully and from a certain angle. "Why would I do that? It's not as if I have to let you in when you do decide to – to stop by, you know."

Nonsense, of course he _has_ to. He would feel compelled to do let him in even if every single Sasuke's visit would not end with very enjoyable, if not always gentle, sex. It's because whenever Sasuke showed up at his doorstep he seemed as if he was in some sort of trouble and needed a place to hide.

Sasuke's eyes lose the shadows. Naruto swallows and says, "But it's not as if I could have let you know or anything."

Of course, if he had a way of contacting Sasuke at all, there would be no need to move – but that information is best kept secret.

"No?" Sasuke answers, finally picking up his mug. "A simple message with your former landlord would have saved me some time."

Naruto grinds his teeth in an effort not to snap. _Then I would still stay awake every night, waiting for you to show up! _It was impossible to live that way long before Naruto summoned willpower to leave, with self-loathing and helplessness much worse than the sleep deprivation. Sasuke's stony refusal to let on any information about himself was maddening.

"I didn't think of it." Sasuke doesn't answer. Naruto tries again. "How did you find me?"

Something happens. There is a struggle that reflects clearly on Sasuke's face. He opens his mouth, closes and purses his lips. Naruto, who's not expecting an answer at all, pays more attention to how annoyingly kissable Sasuke's mouth looks and finds himself surprised when he hears, "I have connections with the police."

"Really?"

Sasuke inhales audibly. Words come somewhat easier this time around, and Sasuke clears up, "You remember Kakashi? He's with the police."

Yes, Naruto remembers Kakashi. For a short while at the beginning of the – _the thing _they had, when nothing was suggesting that Sasuke was a weird, paranoid freak with odd habits who considered a working relationship one in which showing up on Naruto's doorstep once in a quarter of a year, he met Kakashi.

This reminds him, "Oh, I knew that, I saw him tonight. He was on TV. There was some big arrest or something – I was not paying it too much attention. But I saw Kakashi talking to the reporters about it."

Against all odds, Sasuke smiles again. He is definitely happy about something tonight, even if he did not like Naruto moving without informing him.

"I saw it." He takes a mouthful of his tea and drowns his smile in it.

"What was that all about?" Naruto questions, hoping for a neutral subject to stick and distract him from the questions he really wants to ask.

"Nothing that matters right now."

Well, there goes that conversation. Naruto finally snaps, "Is there anything you _are_ willing to talk about? Maybe who beat the fuck out of you, again? Because I'd sure like to hear about that."

"No, I don't want to talk about that, either." Sasuke says calmly. Naruto could swear he seems more relaxed then he was moments ago. Why, because they switched the subject? Or maybe because Naruto was demanding answers, instead of trying to restrain himself from it?

"Let us see then. Are you, by any chance, in the mood to share your phone number? Or the address?" Naruto glares, expecting a no.

"I have neither at the moment." Sasuke tells him, frowning at the empty mug as if it is doing the questioning. His tone dries just a bit around the end. "Is it okay to get back to you on that in a couple of days?"

_Very funny_, Naruto is about to say. But Sasuke looks up before he can speak and he looks serious, questioning and uncomfortable. So, instead, Naruto whispers, "But… How can you not have an address? Where do you live?"

"I was staying at someone's for awhile. That arrangement, thank God, is off now."

"With whom?" Naruto wants to know, even if it is what chilled his blood and Sasuke had someone all this time – someone else. His throat is dry but he presses, "Why is it off?"

"It was just a business arrangement." Sasuke dismisses it without glancing up. It doesn't make anything better, because Naruto's mind, unbidden, brushes dust off one of his many theories, about Sasuke as the rent-boy. Or gigolo. Under the weight of the sudden hope that he might actually get an answer or two, Naruto pushes his jealously away for a moment.

"What business?"

"I'm tired." Sasuke says in flat voice. He leaves the mug on the table and turns completely to face Naruto on the couch. "Can we talk about this in the morning?"

The anticipation that swelled Naruto's chest fades. He snorts bitterly. "You will be out of here long before I even wake up."

"Not this time."

Sasuke sounds sincere, not that Naruto knows the difference. He wants to believe it but he can't, and he really shouldn't, even though Sasuke never promised anything like it before.

"You're hungry." Naruto says. He doesn't know what else he can offer. "Aren't you?"

"Yes." Sasuke reaches for him, a hand movement quick and efficient. They are kissing a moment later, and that is familiar and easy. Naruto turns off his brain and drags himself closer to Sasuke, desperate as always for the little he can get.

Something is different, he soon realizes. Not in a bad way. Sasuke is kissing, as always, with skill that comes from nothing less than mastery but… Something is… There is _something_…

Naruto grunts into the kiss as he realizes. This kiss is _slow_. It's wonderful and arousing and slow enough to take in and map every feeling, every sensation. Sasuke's tongue caresses his, playful and clever. Naruto pushes forwards, demanding more. He doesn't dare, he doesn't want it to change. He just wants this kiss to last forever, because it's louder than any words and means more than any explanations. He lets his hand slid down Sasuke's side and enjoys the solid warmth under his fingers, the slight curve of Sasuke's hip and low rustle of the shirt.

He mindlessly presses on and Sasuke hisses in pain. Naruto breaks the kiss completely and lowers his head into Sasuke's neck. "Sorry. I forgot about that."

"It's nothing." Sasuke says, cocking his head so Naruto would have better excess.

Naruto obediently licks before remembering. "You're hungry."

Sasuke hisses again, this time in annoyance. "Later."

But Naruto is already pushing himself off. "I have plenty left from my diner…"

"_Naruto._"

"No!" Naruto snaps again. It's so easy to snap at Sasuke, because he never makes a big deal out of it if he isn't in the mood to fight and this time Naruto needs him to understand. "We're not doing this on the fucking couch, not after…"

_That kiss_ stays unsaid. But from the look in Sasuke's eyes, it's enough. He nods slightly. Naruto turns away, to the kitchen.

Sasuke follows a couple of minutes later, just as the leftovers from Naruto's diner are warm and ready. He must have smelled it. They are sitting together at the table. Sasuke is eating and Naruto is watching him. It is an oddly comfortable moment, silent and cozy.

Naruto breaks it, for his skin is still vibrant from Sasuke's warmth on places. "Are you hurt anyplace else? Do you need…"

"I'm fine."

Naruto scowls. "I heard that before."

"Did you make this?" Sasuke says, disregarding his worry. "It's actually eatable."

There's nothing like a compliment from Sasuke. It makes you feel like you are both the dirt on his foot and the precious but small gem hidden inside that dirt. Naruto shrugs, noticing with satisfaction that Sasuke is just finishing the last of his dinner a large portion of Greek meat-and-potato moussaka. "Yeah, well… The expiration date on the milk was last week, but it didn't stink _too_ much so I…"

Sasuke, who starts coughing at the 'last week' part, finally recognizes the tone and glares at him. Naruto makes an innocent and hurt face. For some reason, that just makes Sasuke huff and take the last bite instead of insulting him. He grumbles, "Grow up."

"The milk really had expired," Naruto explains, grinning. "But it doesn't go into that dish – not necessarily, so I just threw it out this morning."

The short cough made Sasuke's cheeks flush; it looks violent against his sickly complexion. Naruto wonders when the last time he was out in the sun was. He didn't look so pale on the day they met. But then, things obviously went downhill since. In the harsher light in the kitchen, the redness in the angles of Sasuke's eyes and the dark shadows under are even more obvious and disturbingly familiar.

Sasuke dumps his empty plate into the sink, but he doesn't offer to wash it. Naruto has to do it himself. In the meanwhile, Sasuke disappears somewhere.

Some minutes later, Naruto can hear the water in the bathroom running from the hall. It's a safe bet Sasuke raided his closet, as he had nothing with him – as usual. The amount of clothes he took with him and never returned was so high, Naruto long since started to count with it and buy extra.

As he is still in his pajama bottoms and favorite blue sleeping shirt, Naruto simply crawls back to bed. The lamp in the corner is the only light in the room. Misty amber glow is giving the room artificial warmth. The sheets are uncomfortably cold, but the sounds coming from the bathroom are clear and welcome. He closes his eyes and listens.

Despite of trying to escape from it, he fell back to the old pattern without struggle. Sasuke makes him nothing but miserable, because for every five minutes he is around, it comes a day when he's not. But Naruto can't help it. He can't, he doesn't want to say no. He doesn't really want to leave, he doesn't want for Sasuke to stay away.

But he is so sick of it, at the same time. He is sick of secrets, of wondering if they are even if they are _valid_ secrets and not simply the way Sasuke likes things to be. He is sick of waiting. He is sick wanting and only getting cramps. He is sick of staring in the ceiling at night and making deals with whoever is listening to at least make is more often, if not permanent.

By the time the sounds of running water stop, Naruto is near tears. He shakes his head and tries to think about something else. About the good times. About the way all their encounters end, with Sasuke sleeping soundly and Naruto smiling into his pillow. About the sex.

About that kiss.

It's not healthy to think of it as if it some form of a promise, an oath of some kind. He can't help it.

Sasuke comes in. He is in Naruto's pajamas and he smells like Naruto's soap when he sits down at the edge of the bed. The way he looks around the room instead of at Naruto could turn awkward and uncomfortable if it carries on. The bedroom is filled with Naruto's furniture, even though the place is different and he is pretty sure Sasuke was in it at least twice by now – when he first walked around the house, searching for whatever and when he searched the room for Naruto's clothes before going to the shower. It isn't curiosity. Sasuke is not at ease, for some reason. That is new and unfamiliar. Naruto smiles on the thought – any change is good.

"Come on." He says as he pushes the covers to make room for Sasuke. "It's getting cold."

Sasuke doesn't react. Naruto shifts and sits up so he could see his face, just in time to hear, "I do owe you a few answers."

The statement is lingering between them for a moment, eerily still. Sasuke is clearly tired, even his voice sounds drained. A blind person wouldn't be able to miss that weariness, let alone someone looking directly at him. Every tense line on his face can pass as evidence that he has been through decades of strain, even though that surely can't be true. Either way, Sasuke needs rest more than he needs air.

Naruto wants those answers. He also desperately wants to keep Sasuke, to have him, to close his arms around him and make it the most perfect resting place in the world. He leans forward and brushes his nose and cheek against Sasuke's shoulder. "Well, if you were telling me the truth and you won't run away while I'm still sleeping, then we can talk in the morning."

While he is talking, Sasuke leans back into him. His eyes are closed when he answers, "I'm likely to sleep for a week or so."

The close proximity of a bed seems to be shuttering what there was of Sasuke's determination to talk. Naruto is somewhat sorry, because of course Sasuke would be gone before he is even aware and with him his answers will be gone too. But when Sasuke gets under the covers after turning the lamp off, cold from the shower - a presence welcome and familiar - Naruto offers his body warmth. From all past experience, they should be having sex now, but instead they are falling asleep clothed, Naruto with his arm firmly around Sasuke and Sasuke with his face buried into his neck.

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XIXIXIXIXIXIXIXIX

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Naruto wakes up at dawn with a gasp and painfully heavy weight on his chest. Confused, disoriented and with the remains of a disturbing dream he can't quite remember, he somehow disentangles himself from Sasuke to get up.

He shivers as his feet encounter the cold floor. There is just enough of daylight to find his way around. Naruto regretfully glances at his place in bed and at Sasuke, sleeping there with his mouth slightly open in most undignified manner. The sight makes him grin and it swipes away the last of the dream's creepy residue. Naruto rushes to the bathroom, eager to get back to bed as soon as possible.

The sun is quicker than him, so when Naruto gets back, the room is already yellowish. Through the blinds, it makes a nice pattern on the opposite wall. Naruto slips into the bed again and sighs. He is still worried Sasuke will disappear; this would probably be the time Sasuke usually gets up and goes away. But when he looks at the broom top of black hair, it doesn't look like it would move anytime soon. Naruto smiles again, for the first time allowing himself to consider breakfast for two. There should be enough eggs…

"Stop staring." Sasuke mumbles. He should be too sleepy to so irritated, but the edge is there. "I can't sleep with you staring at me."

"I'm not." Naruto cheerfully disagrees. "You're dreaming."

Sasuke wraps his arm around Naruto's middle, too tight for comfort. His nose is brushing against Naruto's shoulder as he mumbles, "Close your eyes and be quiet."

"I'm not a teddy bear." Naruto complains. Sasuke seems to be already sleeping again, so he closes his eyes a second later in silence. He smiles; he should try to make himself more comfortable if he wants to catch some more sleep.

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XIXIXIXIIXIXIXI

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Naruto is cold when he wakes up for the second time. He reaches out before he opens his eyes and of course, _of course_, the bed next to him is empty. The coldness of the sheets under his fingers on Sasuke's side burn his chest. It was stupid of him to hope, very stupid.

"Son of a bitch." He curses, stupidly, senselessly. Anger is better than paying close attention to the burning in his chest.

"What?" A mildly startled voice asks.

Naruto's helpless anger lingers just a second longer before he opens his eyes. Sasuke is standing, barefoot and with messy hair, next to the closet, with hands full of clothes. He is _right there_, frowning. Naruto lets his head fall back on his pillow as his mind repeats the words like chanting – _he's right there._

"'m cold," he says, because even though that wasn't why he was swearing, it is true. "Weren't you gonna sleep for a week?"

Sasuke moves, his steps light and approaching. He dumps what he had in his hands on the far side of the bed; Naruto can feel the sudden weight on his knees. Then there's a shadow over his face, the bed yields under Sasuke's weight and he says, "My bladder had different plans."

Naruto smiles as familiar scents and feelings overflow him. Sasuke's hair looks even messier up close; it's all over his face – too long and uncombed. He entangles his fingers into it, amazed when they aren't stuck and drags Sasuke to him for closer inspection. His left eye is still bruised, of course. There are some traces of tiredness, shadowing his features. Overall…

"Much better." Naruto declares.

If the sound Sasuke lets out was even meant to be an answer, it fails its purpose. They are too close not to, so they kiss. It's sort of stupid in the beginning because Naruto can't stop grinning. But Sasuke moves the covers off him and it's soon very hard to think. It's hard to feel anything but Sasuke's restless hands that are tracing Naruto's stomach and his hips; impatient fingers finding the way under his underwear.

There is an odd wince when Sasuke stops kissing him to pull off his clothes. It reminds Naruto of that horrible bruise on Sasuke's side. He reaches to lift his shirt and take a better look. It is even worse in the bright morning light, dark and nasty and large.

"Ouch." Naruto grimaces in sympathy.

"It's nothing." Sasuke dismisses it, already back trailing Naruto's neck with his lips. It hurts to hear in his voice that it is not bravado, that he means it, believes it. It hurts to be a witness to how much pain he must have been through in his life, for only someone used to it could consider something this bad as nothing.

Naruto pushes him a little bit backwards. Ignoring the annoyed glare, he lifts Sasuke's shirt again, this time all the way off. His fingers brush the bluish skin for a second before Naruto leans in to taste it. Sasuke hisses, maybe in pain, maybe in pleasure.

"It's a shame," Naruto mutters, spreading his legs reluctantly to let Sasuke nest between them for a better access. "How you mistreat your body."

He wants to mention that Sasuke's sides feel like he had nothing to eat for weeks, that he needs and food care, that he needs more sleep and less strain. But it seems like that might be something to deal with later. Naruto settles on enjoying the way Sasuke bend to the side to fetch lube from the first drawer, where he knows Naruto always keeps it.

"Turn around." Sasuke instructs him.

Naruto blinks up at him, quite sure his incredulity is obvious. As if expecting a punch line, he mumbles, "Uh huh."

Sasuke gestures shortly at the bruise on his stomach. "Less strain on my body."

It's anything but fair. He can't as well refuse to do such insignificant thing as to bottom if that means Sasuke wouldn't hurt himself further.

"Turn around." Sasuke orders again, pushing on Naruto's hip with his warm palm, as if to help. His tone is little bit dry and sexier for it. Naruto finds that he is not that averse to the idea of bottoming, not even after all the previous times when he failed to enjoy it wholeheartedly.

"I want to stay like this." He says, because Sasuke is striking like this, impatient and flushed. "I want to watch you."

"Just trust me. This way is better for both of us right now." Sasuke pushes harder on his hip. Naruto gives in and turns around to kneel, gathering both pillows close by in case he needs support. Sasuke moves instantly and leans over, not quite bringing them flesh to flesh but close enough to feel just like it. He whispers into the back of Naruto's neck. "You don't have watch. You will feel me."

Sasuke's dick is brushing over Naruto's upper thigh. On his neck, the air fresh out of Sasuke's lungs is hot. Naruto shivers as he moves so his breath grazes his ear. It makes him smile slightly and admit that, yes, he doesn't have to see to be able to feel.

Sasuke's hand is solid pressure over Naruto's spine when he straightens up, even while he's pulling off the lid of the lube jar. It's as if he wants to prove his statement. The warmth of the thought is not enough to overshadow the warmth that is gathering rapidly in his belly, so when Naruto finally feels Sasuke's palm sliding lower he is almost prepared for the sensation.

For someone who gets into fights as much as Sasuke, his palms are peculiarly gentle. Naruto closes his eyes and rests his forehead against the wall over the bed. Preparation, especially after so many months, is rarely pleasant. He breathes evenly through it, forcing himself to pay attention to Sasuke's hands. They move around, smoothly, coax Naruto into relaxation. Sasuke is letting out small noises that sometimes sound like cajoling and sometimes like impatience. It's arousing in its own way. Naruto doesn't touch himself, not once, but he is hard anyway when Sasuke asks, breathlessly, "Okay?"

It's okay, even if a little bit too early. Sasuke's haste, the evident need in his voice; that is what is important. So it is okay. Naruto nods his head.

He almost regrets it a moment later. It's painful – and fuck it, he's just not built to be a bottom, what ever came over him to go along with it? But Sasuke is still gentle and careful and his palm on Naruto's back is still warm and solid enough to hold Naruto's focus. Very soon, after Sasuke enters him, settles some and finally moves, it's all better. Better, going on _great_.

Naruto has to remove his head from where it was resting. When Sasuke adopts a not very satisfying but steady pace, his head is in danger of slamming into the wall. Naruto opens his eyes and looks back over his shoulder instead. It's quite a sight over there. Even with Sasuke's stupid hair hiding half of his face, he looks good, focused and sweaty. His skin is sweaty, eyes half closed, mouth just open enough to allow him to suck in some air here and there.

Naruto's arousal sharpens. He removes one of his hands of the backrest of the bed to wrap it around his cock. Sasuke notices the movement. He follows Naruto's hand for a moment, but it's clear there is nothing he can see from that angle so instead he finds Naruto's eyes with his own. They are still somewhat hidden, but not enough to hide the look of bareness blended with a number of nameless emotions.

Naruto holds his gaze. He doesn't quite pump his cock; more like he lets it gain as much friction against his palm as possible from the drive Sasuke is providing. That turns out to be more gratifying than expected. A minute later pressure is mounting; something is tightening inside him more and more with every movement until he is at the end, riding over the edge of the orgasm. For some reason, even as every muscle in his body seems to be contracting and singing, with sweat gathered in his brows and lungs airless, Naruto finds it easy to hold Sasuke's gaze.

Maybe he blackens out for a bit, maybe Sasuke just finished at the same time, but when Naruto drains out they stop moving. Things and lights dance a bit around his head, until he remembers to start breathing again.

Sasuke practically collapses next to him. His panting eases up soon and he doesn't move for a long time. Naruto finally realizes that Sasuke is falling asleep.

"Hey!" He calls, shaking Sasuke's shoulder. "I'm hungry."

"I'm tired." Sasuke responds and, as if to prove it, yawns.

Naruto shakes him again – not so much because he needs Sasuke to go with him as much as Sasuke could really use some food, judging by his ribs that are actually countable when he is laying down on his back. "You can sleep later."

"I plan to. I have six and a half days to sleep." Sasuke mumbles. Then a corner of his lips creeps upward, forming a self satisfied smirk. "To sleep and to fuck you."

It sounds like brilliant plan, Naruto thinks. But he had enough sleep for now and Sasuke needs to eat, too. "I have to go to work soon. You can get back to bed as soon as I leave."

Finally, Sasuke opens his eyes. "Fine."

Naruto goes to the bathroom with a grin on his face. He leaves door ajar behind him.

.

XIXIXIXIXIXI

.

"I have family." Sasuke says while frowning at his plate full of scrambled eggs. Ever since they got downstairs, the expression on his face was not unlike of someone suffering from constipation. Naruto wanted to snicker at it, but there is only one thing Sasuke has a problem to eliminate out of his body - explanations. His patience is being rewarded. "They would not turn me out if I choose to go to them."

Naruto doesn't say that despite everything, he likes that Sasuke chose to come to him._ Back_ to him; even if for a while. But if Sasuke has family he doesn't go to and has no home, then what kind of life he is leading? Moreover, for God's sake, _why_?

"I don't." He says. It's true. He's pretty sure Sasuke knows it. It's better than silence.

Sasuke doesn't acknowledge it in any way. "I haven't seen them in four years now."

"I'm sure," Naruto starts but he needs a pause to think up what to say, exactly. Sasuke just told him that he hasn't seen his family, by choice, for four years. What do you say to that? "I'm sure they miss you and are," _frantic, out of their minds_, "er, worried."

"Usually when I get time – time off, I look like this." Sasuke makes vague gesture toward his face. "It's not necessary for them to see that."

But it's acceptable for Naruto to see it, seeing that Sasuke has no problem coming to him beaten up and half-starved. It's not for comfort, because Naruto is horrible at giving it and would be unable to offer without any idea what's up anyway. And he can't even begin to picture Sasuke accepting it.

"So do they know about-" Naruto cuts himself again to think about how to word it, because what he really wants is to ask is if Sasuke's mother knows how dreadfully thin her son is.

"About what I do for a living? They do."

Sasuke's tone is light and amused now, as if Naruto's lack of eloquence is a good joke.

"What _are_ you doing for a living?" The amusement in Sasuke's eyes tightens so Naruto rushed forward before the mood is completely ruined. "No, don't bother; I think I figured it out. You're a spy."

It is one of the theories, but Naruto means it more as a joke right now. It does not seem likely that someone like him would know, not to mention have sex with, can be something so cool. Well, not that whatever can render the guy Naruto met four years ago to this bruised, closed off and small person across the table from him can be all that cool. But still.

Sasuke stares at Naruto. The fork he was finally using to start on his breakfast stays suspended in air. "A spy? How come?"

"Well, you always do these weird things, like last night. Look up behind the doors and up at he ceiling, like you're looking for something. Someone. You never have any documents with you." Even though technically new information, and he had no time to connect it with this particular theory, Naruto also points out, "You don't have an address and phone number. And you always take my clothes when you go away, never the things you left before, even though it's always clean and folded."

Sasuke finally stops looking at him with that last point. There are probably more things Naruto could mention, but he waits instead to hear what Sasuke has to say. The answer comes after several long seconds. "I guess I'm somewhat paranoid."

"No shit." Naruto snorts and picks to probe at the safest subject. "So why do you look around my house like that? Do you think I'm a counter-spy?"

"It's just a stupid habit. You are a school teacher. And you watch too much television."

Naruto doesn't let that sidetrack him. "And you?"

"If I was a spy," Sasuke tells him, finally taking some eggs on his fork. "I would have told you I was a doctor. Or maybe a combat pilot."

And that, of course, is not an answer at all. Naruto grounds out, "Then what the hell can be so damn hard to talk….?"

Just then, Sasuke cocks his head a little and shushes him with his hand. He is quiet and looking into the distance, as if listening something Naruto can't hear, until Naruto starts thinking that he is playing tricks.

Sasuke asks, "Are you expecting someone?"

Put off by the whispering, Naruto shakes his head. Sasuke stands up off the table and put his plate full of still warm eggs into the refrigerator, together with the fork, piece of bred and his glass half full with juice. Naruto watches him, dumbfounded.

"Don't let in or say anything about me if it's someone you don't know." Sasuke orders quietly, before leaving the kitchen.

After a couple of seconds, the doorbell rings cheerfully through the house. Nervous and a little bit afraid, Naruto walks out into the hallway to answer the door. He pulls them open after taking a steadying breath. He finds Kakashi standing on the other side.

"Hello, Naruto." He greets brightly.

"Hi." Naruto responds, wondering what he should do. He doesn't actually know Kakashi. They were introduced, yeah, but maybe Sasuke meant that he should only let in people he knows very well.

Wait, Kakashi is some kind of cop, isn't he? Maybe Sasuke is hiding from the police, maybe he is a criminal. That is one of the theories, after all.

But no, Sasuke said he got Naruto's new address from Kakashi, and he can't be hiding from Kakashi and getting information from him in the same time. Unless Kakashi is corrupted, a dirty…

"Are you going to invite me in?" Kakashi interrupts Naruto's brainstorming.

"Why? What do you want?"

Kakashi points out the garment bag in his hand Naruto completely failed to notice. "I brought Sasuke his uniform. The judge wants to see him again."

"Uniform?" Naruto asks suspiciously looking at the shiny silver vinyl.

"It's okay." Sasuke speaks from practically behind Naruto. When and how he got there is a mystery, but Naruto is relieved all the same. "Let him in."

Kakashi walks in before Naruto can gracefully gesture him inside. It's rather rude, Naruto thinks just before Kakashi looks up Sasuke up and down and says, "You look better."

Sasuke only frowns in turn. "You promised me a week off."

"I know. This was unexpected. The judge wants to fill in some blanks."

"There are no blanks. My report is perfect."

"This is very important case, Sasuke. You know this. If she has questions, I'm sorry but you have to find time to answer them. You can have a real vacation when things quiet down."

It's a weird conversation. Naruto finds himself looking at Sasuke's deep, angry scowl, waiting for an answer. Sasuke was looking fine that morning, but the last night's tiredness was already starting to shadow his face after this short conversation.

"Once this trial is over, you won't be able to find us for a month."

With that threat that Naruto is sure included him as well, Sasuke takes the garment bag Kakashi was offering and walks away, toward the stairs.

It's uncomfortable, standing there in the middle of the hall, alone with Kakashi.

"Do you want some coffee?" Naruto offers, only party because that is the polite thing to do. He needs something to do. Kakashi nods, so he leads the way back to the kitchen.

While waiting for the kettle of water to boil, Naruto turns around with the intent to make conversation. He doesn't know quite what to say, he should direct his questions and the growing suspicions to Sasuke. But he is itching to make sure.

Sasuke says that Kakashi promised him a week off. And he was talking about some report. He made it sound as if Kakashi was his boss. And Kakashi is a cop – a cop that just cracked a huge case, by arresting a crime lord of some sort. Now Naruto is maybe not the brightest bulb in the house, but he isn't a moron.

"It's remarkable," Kakashi says softly, startling him out of his musing. "That you put up with this for so long."

"With what?" Naruto thinks that he knows the answer to that, but he is feeling defensive.

Kakashi ignores it. "It's remarkable that you were letting him come to you whenever he had to, without any explanations, for four years. You barely knew each other when he had to go on this assignment."

"How do you know it was without explanations?"

"This is a dangerous game," Kakashi says, so lightly it sounds inappropriate and it's unnerving. "Of course we have been keeping an eye on you."

Naruto glares at him, pretty sure that means that he is under some surveillance. He has nothing illegal to hide, but damn it. There are everyday embarrassments he would rather keep to himself.

"So see, if Sasuke had broken the rules and said anything, I would not go out of my way to make it possible for him to see you safely once in awhile." Kakashi's tone is just barely darker. It's still unnerving. "Not to mention that putting you in that kind of danger would make him a bad cop, which Sasuke is not."

That is possibly a good explanation for why Sasuke was finding it so hard to simply say that he is a cop. If it was so important for him to hold silence for so long – even though Naruto could have snapped and threw him out at any point – it must not be very easy to just – open, all of the sudden.

"Is he doing this sort of – undercover – _thing_ often?" Naruto asks finally.

"I see you did not have enough time to talk about this." Kakashi answers with sly smile. "This sort of mission is something a cop can do only once. Besides, Sasuke will certainly be promoted as soon as possible. Your patience will pay off."

…Patience? But Naruto was all but patient. He kept demanding answers. He kept pushing Sasuke. It was a wonder why was he coming back at all. It must have been really hard to go someplace you knew you were only to be asked same old questions you are not allowed to answer, over and over again.

Unexpectedly, Naruto feels embarrassed and unworthy. He thinks of all the theories running through his head, about Sasuke the drug addict, Sasuke the rent boy, Sasuke the spy, Sasuke in an abusive marriage with a crazy woman. He was being ridiculous.

Sasuke walks in while Naruto is still thinking about it, in his perfectly ironed uniform of blue and black, with the cape in his hands. He looks over, expecting to see Naruto's reaction. The uniform makes him look even more striking, colors in perfect synchronization with his complexion, cut just so to point out all the perfect angles of his body. Naruto has to smile, partly happy Sasuke is looking right back at him and partly growing aroused at an unbelievable rate.

"I thought," Naruto says after clearing his throat. "That this sort of thing, going undercover and that, is something they do in the movies."

Sasuke smirks slightly, possibly pleased about not having to actually voice that he is a cop and that he was on a mission for the last four years and that was the reason for his mysteriousness. "It's not as glamorous, definitely."

"I'll wait outside." Kakashi announces before leaving the kitchen. Naruto doesn't even turn to see him off, because Sasuke is walking toward him. His eye is still bruised, of course, but somehow even that fits into the picture. Everything feels as if it's on its own rightful place, finally.

Naruto offers his hand as soon as Sasuke is close enough, smiling. Sasuke takes it, backs him up against the kitchen table and kisses him right there. It's doesn't last nearly long enough.

"I'll be back as soon as the judge fills in her _blanks_." Sasuke stresses out.

Naruto wants to be selfish and hold him for it, but he shakes his head. "No, you won't."

"I will. It's just a formality, it won' take…"

"I know, but you should go see your family." In his arms, Naruto can feel Sasuke wince a bit. He squeezes harder, regretting just a little bit his actions are ruining the fresh crisp of Sasuke's uniform.

"Fine." Sasuke agrees, not happily. "I'll go see them first."

"But come back later, okay? Tonight?" Sasuke nods and starts retreating. Naruto, embarrassed but determined, keeps him for a moment longer, with a solid grip on Sasuke's sleeve. "Like this, okay?"

"Like what?"

Waving curtly at his entire appearance, Naruto mutters, "Like, er - wearing _that_."

Sasuke glances down at his uniform and says, surprisingly solemn, "Ah. Fine." Maybe he missed his uniform. Or maybe he thought before about all the things that are now playing out in Naruto's head at the speed of light.

They walk together to the front door. Kakashi is just outside, waiting patiently. He gives Naruto an odd look and smiles again his sly, hidden smile. It must be that Naruto's face looks as hot as it feels.

Sasuke brushes his hand against Naruto's one last time before walking out, but he doesn't look back or says goodbye. That's quite alright. It is Naruto's first time ever to walk him out, see him leaving, but it is also his first time to have Sasuke's promise that he would come back.

Kakashi leads Sasuke to the jeep that is parked across the street, where Naruto can barely see across his spacious front yard. Despite the distance, he doesn't miss when Sasuke turns to look back him through the closed window, even with weak sunshine reflecting from the glass. The last of the uncertainty disappears and the knowledge rips through him: Sasuke will definitely come back.

Tonight.


End file.
